In My Travels: Cattle Class

Does it get any worse than this?

Let me take a split second to off load my armful of barbies, pour a cuppa and sit in my writing chair. Let me savour this non chaotic moment for just a moment, thanks….

Ok, so I got to thinking, If one could eliminate the time spent travelling on flights to places far and beyond and just arrive… Wouldn’t they be an inventive genius? You know, ‘Like I Dream of Jeannie’? In the batter of an eyelid she was where she wanted to be.

Plane travel; it is not the place to spread out and relax if you are unfortunate enough to travel with the cattle. Moo. To extend ones limbs is oh but a dream, un sogno.One holds onto the ambitious ideology that the hours will eventually end (which they do) and that the confined space will be taken away. Feet will be put to steady ground and arms and legs will be free to fill spaces that they were intended to.
Another horrid flying fact is, what if you don’t like your neighbour? I once had a man sitting or rather lying next to me who picked and flicked his toe nails on a long haul flight from Sydney to Bangkok. I was repulsed, I was gagging and I was ready to vomit as I sheltered my toddler from the gruesome creature. But where could I go? What could I do? I reported him to the stewardess whose calm programmed response was to stare at me blankly and retort ‘there is nothing I can do Maam…’ I hate being called ‘Maam’ I find it a word that is degrading for some reason. That nightmarish flight lasted an eternity. We were prisoners. There was only a certain number of times that I could walk the aisles in a state of nauseated and sleep deprived zombieness. Thankfully, the gent in question was not on the next leg of the flight to Rome.

We travel to see and do. It is true ‘the more you see, the more you want to see’. Sometimes remaining stagnant and staple gunned to your own existence is a more viable altenative. Generally, you can save yourself about $2000 in flights and avoid an infuriating neighbour on a flight lasting an eternity.

Are we all really just gluttons for punishment or is sufferance more supportable than seeing and learning nothing?
Or maybe I should just travel business class, they say it’s definitely worth it. Maybe it’s like having an epidural as opposed to giving birth naturally.
But that’s another story…